The Great Debate

During the ups and downs of figuring out who's medical opinion to go with, I really was torn over medication. One part of me wanted to flea from the idea mostly due to fear and pride. Then another part of me on a bad day wanted nothing more than a temporary fix.

I had been praying for a while about taking the medication and was waiting on an audible voice of God to direct me and it hasn't happened. Something in my spirit kept telling me to wait on the medication. We went before the Elders of our church and they prayed over Drew & I. It was an awesome experience to sit, share, not be judged, and be prayed for. I had hoped this would be the healing point or answer...still nothing.

Then the other night when I was reading a book (a book I might say I should have read weeks ago) and this sectioned jumped out at me...

"We can pester the Lord regarding something for which He has already shown us His will. He will then allow us to do what we want even when it is against His original plan- even when it is not in our best interest. Often God's plan causes us to face hurts and attitudes we don't want to face. Yet we run from the very thing that will bring strength to our lives. Refusing to deal with the offense will not free us from the problem. It will only give us temporary relief. The root of the problem remains untouched."

The book is speaking of offenses, however, this jumped out at me about taking medication or not. I felt the Lord saying, I showed you my will for YOU...I had the unsettled spirit. Don't run, stand strong, let's deal with the root. (Let me insert here that there is nothing wrong with medication for anxiety/depression. I just was not sure this was the path I was to walk. From the beginning I have felt a spiritual component to this battle, not just a medical one.)

So after this neat revelation, I started to question if I was pulling this way out of context as the book clearly has nothing to do with this topic. I sat down that night before bed to crank out another chapter and I kid you not, the chapter is on revealed word of God. The author talks about how, "when you listen to a minister or read a book, we should look for the words or phrases that explode in our spirits. This is the Word God is revealing to us."

Clear enough for me. So, right now, we walk this path using supplements until healing or the Lord changes the course. The next chapter spoke to me on this issue as well but I'll save that for another day...